Decided to make me one of those list over books and movies I've watched so far this year, I guess, mostly for my own .. enjoyment :P I'll be honest and admit that I don't get much reading done, though

Books

- A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
- On Beauty (Zadie Smith)
- The Cider House Rules (John Irving)
- The Book Thief (Marcus Zusak)
- Twilight (Stephenie Meyer)
- Hotel New Hampshire (John Irving)
- The World According to Garp (John Irving)

(7)

.. oops.

Movies (that I've seen for the first time)
- Match Point
- Lost Highway
- Moulin Rouge
- Mars Attacks
- A River Runs Through It
- Reconstruction
- The colour of pomegranates/Sayat Nova
- Little Miss Sunshine
- Le Mari de la Coiffeuse
- Pink Flamingoes
- Waltz with Bashir
- Milk
- Napoleon Dynamite
- Death Proof
- History of Violence
- The Tin Drum
- Caligula
- Mulholland Drive
- A Clockwork Orange
- My Kid Could Paint That (documentary)
- Blue Velvet
- Kontroll
- Persepolis
- Fried Green Tomatoes
- March of the Penguins
- Bring it On
- Star Wars episode IV: a new hope
- Star Wars episode V: the empire strikes back
- The Science of Sleep
- The Darjeeling Limited
- Alfie
- High Fidelity
- Jamon Jamon
- Blades of Glory
- Capote
- Across the Universe
- Superbad
- Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

(38)

number of times I've heard the song "against all odds" (originally by Phil Collins, but any version will do) on the radio, since April 6, 2009

- 06.04.09
- 07.04.09
- 08.04.09
- 05.06.09

(4)

I GOT IN! I GOT INTO INDUSTRIAL CHEMISTRY AND BIOTECHNOLOGY AT THE NORWEGIAN UNIVERSITY OF SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY :D :D :D :D

One day left of work (6 hrs tomorrow morning) and then I'll be done for this year. Today I had 7-15 shift... I wonder why it has to open at seven in the morning!? We have maybe three customers before nine. And then maybe ten between nine and .. eleven. It's fair enough that it's quiet, then you can just sit and almost fall asleep (or do stretches - in the morning, I always feel like all of my muscles are crumpled up! So it was nice to stretch today at work :P), getting up at six in the morning is definitely a zombiefier when you didn't sleep so well (slept okay last night though, but used a long time to fall asleep...)

Tomorrow I get to sleep in until seven! Yeah. Work at eight and I finish at two, so, nice short day. Store opens at nine on Saturdays so I only get five hours with customers. :P

I'm seeing Harry Potter later, (YAY) I haven't read the book in at least two years which I think is an advantage because I may not be so nitpicky about it (can't remember too much - need to read the series again at least the last two books)? But then again, a review I read said that it was more difficult than the other movies to follow if you weren't into the books. Anyway, the trailers I've seen actually look pretty good.

When the pre premiere(??) was in Oslo they interviewed two people dressed up as McGonagall and Dumbledore, and the reporter said, (to "Dumbledore"), "Well, this movie has a very tragic ending for you!" I guess normal people (and by "normal people" I mean people who have read all the Harry Potter books!) already know that, but shame for the others. If they care. They probably don't if they haven't read the books. I think. Maybe.

Maybe I will shower.

I feel generally slightly better about stuff today, I'm trying to ignore my nervousness. When I was working yesterday, I talked to a guy who used to go in my math class last year of high school and he's studying nanotechnology !!! I was really gaping (in awe) , I've never been so impressed in my life! (Okay, that's an exaggeration, but I was really impressed!) and he was all "yeah, I was lucky". I wish I were smart enough to get into nanotechnology (I'm not by FAR, even though I get two extra points for being a girl! There are only two master degrees in the technology/engineering area (at the Norwegian uni of science&technology) where you DON'T get extra points for being a girl and of course chemistry/biotechnology is one of those), it's so hardcore (looks like a lot of fun too..) wow. I didn't even know he was super smart. Haha.

Anyway.. now I started thinking about getting into university again...
trying to think that I WON'T get in. Let's keep my hopes down, people! I'll never get in!

Actually, I read in the newspaper today that if you're generally a pessimistic person, repeatedly thinking positive thoughts will not make you more positive, in many cases it will leave you even more pessimistic. So I'm trying my best to keep the glass half empty here. I'll probably become a decent person anyway, regardless of what I study (as long as it's science, of course!).

Also, I can always try to get in again next year. And I'm NOT unintelligent if I don't get in. My grades from high school are good, they're all on top in the sciences (also hard sciences) it's other subjects (like geography and PE!) that pull my GPA down to "who-knows" land. YEAH. I'm still smart. Right. Right. Convincing myself. Trying to stay positive and negative at the same time. It's working to some degree.

NOW I can take a shower. :P

OK slightly better today. I've started stalking Mew's myspace because they've started announcing Europe dates. So far they've only put up dates for UK and Germany and one in Paris and one in Amsterdam. They must play in Trondheim, if they won't I'll be so bummed.

Today at work I was wondering why on earth I work in a grocery store, when I dislike people so much. :P Today a woman complained to me because we were selling stuff that expired today for 50 % off (instead of .. for free??) and she was all, "you're the oooooonly store that charges for stuff that expires today and bla bla bla" and her son was all "at mum's work they give that away" multiple times... 1. I don't really care what the "competing stores" do. 2. If something expires today and you were going to buy it to eat it today anyway, what's the big deal? It's still edible on the expiry date grrr. 3. I have nothing to do with this stuff! I'm a young person working as a cashier, do I look like I have any authority!? 4. If she was working in a grocery store herself she should maybe have learned how to NOT be an idiot while shopping. However, she didn't seem so intelligent (surprise, surprise). 5. I'm just very easily ticked off when it comes to other people's stupidity. :)

Then I remember why I work in a grocery store: it was two years ago and I was desperate for a job and all i had to do was go there and say "Hi I would like a job here please" and the boss said "ok, just drop by and we'll teach you the ways". And I haven't had the chance/am too lazy to find a new job. YEA. Maybe next year.

I'm quite frayed. I'm not quite frayed, but my nerves are, it feels like. It's less than a week until I find out about university... and that's the reason of the nervousness. I'm trying to have a pessimistic outlook on it all because it's so difficult to get in and I have absolutely no idea if I will get in because of some change of systems (won't try to explain it, it's very confusing) ... so I'm trying to think that I won't get in anyway, but I know I'll get disappointed if I won't.

Thinking about it makes me want to cry. Or vomit, whatever happens first.

Also am not looking forward to the flight to South Africa which happens the same day as uni stuff so it's like everything happens the same day and I'm afraid that (when) I don't get into my top choice at uni, I'll be really bitchy and snappy. First we're flying from Oslo to Heathrow and then Heathrow to Cape Town, the latter is a 12 hour flight. It's like I've developed a plane phobia out of nowhere... thinking of this makes me want to cry too, I'm such a wimp.

And completely randomly, herpes decided to explode on my lip! So now I don't just feel stressed and nervous, I also feel really ugly. :)

And my body is punishing me for not being pregnant. It's so evil!

Might be contributing to my feeling blah-ness. But on the other hand I usually manage to feel like that without the aid of stupid hormones. :) Yay for me.

Either way, I really hate you this week, body!

On the positive note: I (may) have a flat when I get to Trondheim. :) It's not THAT nice and it's with three other people (ohoo) born in 1991 (double ohoo..), but I'm still on the waiting list for a student flat in a student village (and I have no idea when I might get one!) and it's easier to get a flat in the private marked when I'm actually in the town.

Now... to continue the sulk..

In the end I decided to not go to Roskilde, which was the right decision, I think. During the time I've been home I've been so pumped, just lazing around, staying in the sun reading and swimming in the river. I've been running some more too, three times after my sore throat went away. The first time went pretty badly, the second time really well, and the third... woah. My (older) brother decided to run with me. His pace is MUCH faster than mine, so that was straining (but good). And then when we had run about 5km, he decided we should do some intervals - 4 minutes of intensity (should be 90 % of max heart rate), then 4 minutes rest. SO tired, but it felt really good.. I need to be better at pushing myself and run more killer intervals. And throwing yourself into the river afterwards has never felt better!

Today I'm going to Oslo live festival with Astrid! Yay. Will be nice to hang out with her: friends of mine is an unknown concept to Kongsvinger. I'll be so happy to move to Trondheim, but I can't think too much about it because I'll get so nervous about getting into University I don't even know what to do with myself. It's 19 days until I find out if I get into my top choice or not - it's killing me. And it's the day that I go on holiday, to South Africa - so this whole thing has the potential to ruin my holiday. Waaaaah.

Anyhow, I THOUGHT that was all - maybe it was? Next week I start my (hopefully) hardcore working. Ha! The manager at the job said I'd get 5-day weeks - so it's hopefully somewhere between 30-40 hours a week.

Yes. Good. Bye.

It's so hot! Well, alright: hot by my standards, which is between 25*-30* celsius. It's not too bad, but in the evening, the house is unbearable. I am sitting outside right now and it's quite nice. Another thing is that I'm one of those people who are extremely attractive to mosquitoes, and this place, near a forest and a river, is mosquito heaven. Or hell - whatever you like to call it (I prefer "hell"). And the better part of them (the mosquitoes) end up on the back of my knee, or my thigh. Or my calves, or my arms, or feet. Or fingers. Ahem. Anyway.

I wasn't really going to complain. I'm used to the mosquitoes, and this place is really nice in the summer, anyway. We live right by the riverbank - it's small and cosy and sandy and resembles a beach. Just right by the house, so cooling yourself off is never a problem... it's not even that cold now. My father thought it was 20 degrees, my brother thought it was 18 ... it's water. It's not piss warm, and even better, it's not crowded with people.

Last I went bowling with my (older) brother and his friend. I didn't lose. I think from two sets I managed to scrape some in the lower half of the 200's. Last time I bowled was the Muggle Meet!

Today is my dog (Radja)'s 8th birthday. Hurray for her! I remember when she was a puppy - she was so small, but she still kind of looks like a puppy. I made brownies (I just needed an excuse to bake something!), and they're probably the most unhealthy things I've ever made. Packed with butter and chocolate and sugar... heavier than anvils. Maybe.

Here's a picture of the jubilant dog



that's all
or at least I can't be bothered to write any more.

I got home on Sunday. My father drove down on Saturday with my brother, they checked out the exhibition, we partied and the next day we shoved all of my belongings into the car and drove back home. The exhibition went well. I sold a photo!

It's a bit strange to be home, maybe because I don't have many friends here. I'm pretty awkward at making friends, and really bad at keeping them, I've found out. Something I need to be better at.

In the few days I've been home I've mostly been relaxing and sorting through my clothes. I have given away a LOT to the Salvation Army, and thrown away even more. And still, I have lots of clothes. It just won't end! Also, the day before yesterday I asked my mum if she had any shorts and there I was trying on all of her old jeans and decided to keep ... three pairs, and two pairs of jeans shorts. What's funny (or not-so-funny...) is that my mum had those jeans when she was like 40, and they're really tight on me. And I don't think I've ever been fitter... ohoo. I guess we have different body builds. I feel generally happy with myself. :) I'm so glad I got new jeans, though, I hate buying them! Maybe I should've been Young And Hip in the 90's, when jeans obviously fit me better. I think the "correct" term is "mom jeans", you know jeans that go up to your waist and have looooong zippers. Ha ha!

I very inconveniently got a sore throat not last night, but the night before. I had a sore throat all of yesterday, and it's still there. This vexes me! (I have really wanted an opportunity to use the word "vex" ever since I watched the Pride and Prejudice BBC series.) I want to run, and I can't if I have a cold (I've tried). So now I need to get healthy. Quick! I also start feeling really disgusting if I drink too much tea.

Other than that, I'm going back to work for the summer, which is brilliant because I have had zero income since January. They didn't have any room for me at my regular shop (what !!??!!) so I'm going to work at another store that's in the same chain and also in this town. It also closes one hour earlier so I only have to work until nine pm! Although I could've really used the extra money. I'm grateful for ANY work I'll get. I won't work so much this summer... only until July 19 (I GO TO SOUTH AFRICA ON THE 20TH!) so I hope they have many hours for me... today I'm working 15-21.

Lastly: I've finished some knitting projects AND I've bought a crocheted beanie from barksy from her webshop Zwilling. ( look at it all!! )

That's all.

Bye. :)

It's kind of late ... OK, maybe it's not late, but I'm ridiculously tired. But I felt like writing now, and I've been knitting really obsessively on my sweater. Seriously, I'm so Into It, just can't put it away, but it's going to be so cute, Best Sweater Ever.

Saturday we went to Copenhagen to do a sort of girly trip (and Adam) and we took one of those tourist boats and I bought epic amounts of yarn in the nicest yarn store I've ever been to (I haven't been to that many - six maybe, seven including this one!) and the yarn shop lady complimented me on my cardigan and my shawl (both knitted of course). I got such a kick from being there. Haha.

Apart from that I ate the best sandwich ever and ate an overpriced ice cream and cried in public because I was dreading the party we were going to so much. Yeah, I know .. I kind of suck, and it was embarrassing, but the others were really understanding and I ended up going back to the school. I'm glad I did, because Sofi told me about the happenings of it the next day. It just didn't sound like my kind of thing at all.

But ugh. So I'm not really over my social barriers yet, at ALL, but I think I've become better.

I've started packing, and I have a lot of stuff, especially clothes, they've just been adding up. When I get back home I'm going to give a loooot away to the salvation army or something, because there's simply too much.

I'm looking so much forward to going home, it's strange. I look forward to just being home, swimming in the river, playing football with the boyz (hopefully), running my old route(!), working(!!), getting my hair cut, getting my vaccines for South Africa (oh yeah..) , pet my dog, pet my yarn (...haha), cook my own food ETC. I'm ready to go really. :)

Extremely emo subject line, and from a song no less. I don't really mean it, I just really like the song. But thinking about it, being happy never really lasts for long. Something will eventually happen, and I'll get dragged down to the ground again, and will have to spend a lot of time building myself up again... however, hopefully, those times are over now (for a while). I ended the first challenging part of my life almost a year ago, and I know another challenging part will start soon, but it will be so in a good way. I am stronger, independent and I have better self confidence.

I do worry a bit though, still. I've now spent five months with people pursuing art, art history and things similar to that. And while I know hardcore art isn't for me, I still feel like I fit in, to some degree. I like art, I think it's interesting to learn about different art forms (and the crazy stuff some artists do...), I even make art. Gasp. Putting together my first photo series (consisting of three photos all taken on the U-bahn in Berlin) got me really psyched and I'm so happy with how it looks. Although my photography isn't so much art photography , more portraying people ... Anyway, that wasn't really where I was going.

What I'm thinking is: I like these art people. And then I worry that the science people will be different. I mean, I guess they will and that is all right and I'm looking forward to meet people who ACTUALLY LIKE SCIENCE (gasp)

.. I don't even know where I'm going with this anymore. Haha. I'm just afraid I'll end up with a bunch of workaholics.

I'm sure I won't, but that is what irrational worrying is for! And I know being an artist is a LOT of work as well.

All in all I'm ready to go back home.
And then move away from home. Again.
And let my new life begin.
And still be the person I am.

Alright, that's enough. Good night.